TAKE A LOOK!!! FASHION DO? OR DON’T?

Lady G tones it down a notch—just a tiny bit—in a white, tiered Francesco Scognamiglio dress with matching lace mask and beehive at the 2010 Brit Awards.
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Read more: http://www.eonline.com/photos/gallery.jsp?galleryUUID=1376#ixzz0hiUqMc5y

March 5, 2010

Well it was no secret that while Jay Z was in town for his BP3 tour that he stopped by the White House to greet President Obama. Jay is looking quite sharp in these pics. Take a look and let us know what you think.

visit http://mymoodismusic.com/ to see more.

Research shows that supportive relationships are good for our mental and physical health. However, dealing with difficult people and maintaining ongoing negative relationships is actually detrimental to our health. It’s a good idea to diminish or eliminate relationships that are filled with conflict. But what do you do if the person in question is a family member, co-worker, or someone you otherwise can’t easily eliminate from your life?

The following are tips for dealing with difficult people who are in your life, for better or for worse:

Difficulty: Average
Time Required: Ongoing
Here’s How:

1. Avoid discussing divisive and personal issues, like religion and politics, or other issues that tend to cause conflict. If the other person tries to engage you in a discussion that will probably become an argument, change the subject or leave the room.

2. In dealing with difficult people, don’t try to change the other person; you will only get into a power struggle, cause defensiveness, invite criticism, or otherwise make things worse. It also makes you a more difficult person to deal with.

3. Change your response to the other person; this is all you have the power to change. For example, don’t feel you need to accept abusive behavior. You can use assertive communication to draw boundaries when the other person chooses to treat you in an unacceptable way.

4. Remember that most relationship difficulties are due to a dynamic between two people rather than one person being unilaterally “bad.” Here’s a list of things to avoid in dealing with conflict. Do you do any of them?

5. Try to look for the positive aspects of others, especially when dealing with family, and focus on them. The other person will feel more appreciated, and you will likely enjoy your time together more.

6. However, don’t pretend the other person’s negative traits don’t exist. Don’t tell your secrets to a gossip, rely on a flake, or look for affection from someone who isn’t able to give it. This is part of accepting them for who they are.

7. Get your needs met from others who are able to meet your needs. Tell your secrets to a trustworthy friend who’s a good listener, or process your feelings through journaling, for example. Rely on people who have proven themselves to be trustworthy and supportive. This will help you and the other person by taking pressure off the relationship and removing a source of conflict.

8. Know when it’s time to distance yourself, and do so. If the other person can’t be around you without antagonizing you, minimizing contact may be key. If they’re continually abusive, it’s best to cut ties and let them know why. Explain what needs to happen if there ever is to be a relationship, and let it go. (If the offending party is a boss or co-worker, you may consider switching jobs.)

Tips:

1. Try not to place blame on yourself or the other person for the negative interactions. It may just be a case of your two personalities fitting poorly.

2. Remember that you don’t have to be close with everyone; just being polite goes a long way toward getting along and appropriately dealing with difficult people.

3. Work to maintain a sense of humor — difficulties will roll off your back much more easily. Shows like “The Office” and books like David Sedaris’ Naked can help you see the humor in dealing with difficult people.

4. Be sure to cultivate other more positive relationships in your life to offset the negativity of dealing with difficult people.

http://stress.about.com/od/relationships/ht/difficult.htm

Today is the anniversary of Biggie Small’s Death…

WHO is Biggie? You might ask….

He was and continues to be a hip hop icon!! Check this out

Biggie Smalls 1973-1997

Biggie Smalls slain in shooting

03.14.1997

Rap star Biggie Smalls, the “Notorious B. I. G.,” was shot dead by a drive-by gunman late Saturday night as he was leaving a star-studded Vibe Magazine party in Los Angeles.

The 24-year-old rapper, whose given name was Christopher Wallace, was sitting in a car outside waiting at a traffic light, when the killers pulled up next to him and unleashed a spray of bullets. Biggie was pronounced dead at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. Police were still searching for his killers as we went to press. Here’s John Norris, in Los Angeles, with a timeline.

JOHN NORRIS: The night began at around 8 p.m. at the Peterson Automotive Museum on Wilshire Blvd. in Los Angeles at a party hosted by “Vibe” magazine, Qwest Records, and Tanqueray gin to celebrate Friday night’s 11th annual Soul Train Music Awards.

The guest list was a who’s who of the hip-hop world, including Busta Rhymes, Heavy D, Da Brat, Yo-Yo, producer Jermaine Dupree and, of course, Biggie Smalls and the head of his label, Bad Boy Entertainment, Sean “Puffy” Combs.

According to sources we spoke to, the party really got going around 9:30 or 10:00 p.m., and Biggie appeared to be having a great time taking a table near the dance floor and he was chatting with friends. Indeed, no one in the Bad Boy crew appeared to be concerned about being in Los Angeles, despite the fact that in the past, East coast rappers have been worried about traveling West.

In fact, the only discernable problem with the party is that it became overcrowded, and as is often the case in such situations in L.A., the fire marshals were called in and the party was shut down around 12:35 a.m.

As you can imagine, when the party was suddenly shut down, lots of people began to pour out of the party, out of the museum, into the garage, to wait for their valet parked cars including Biggie and Puffy. The stories do become a bit sketchy here, but according to one source who spoke to “USA Today”, they both waited here for their cars and Biggie got in his GMC Suburban with two other passengers, reportedly Lil Caesar from Jr. MAFIA and his bodyguard, Damian. They rounded the corner from the garage, and drove right up to the corner of Wilshire and Fairfax.

As best we can determine, Biggie’s car came to a stop at a red light at Wilshire and Fairfax when another car, possibly a black Jeep according to an L.A. Times source, drove around to the right side of their car and from it, six to ten shots were then fired from the other vehicle into the passenger side of Biggie’s car. Panic obviously ensued and the Suburban drove straight to nearby Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, which in good traffic is no more than a five minute drive.

Which means at approximately 1:00 a.m., Biggie Smalls was brought here to Cedars-Sinai hospital, although it’s doubtful how much they could do for him, since at 1:15 a.m. Christopher Wallace, also known as Notorious B.I.G. was pronounced dead of gunshot wounds. It wasn’t long before distraught fans and friends showed up here to learn the news of Biggie’s death.

Meanwhile, back at Peterson’s many concerned partygoers went back inside the building fearing an escalation of violence. Apparently, the L.A.P.D. feared the same. They turned out in force, some wearing riot gear. And one witness we spoke to called that show of force, way too much.

Sales of Biggie album explode on first day

by Marcus Errico Mar 26, 1997, 2:45 PM PT

Not much was small about Christopher Wallace. From his 6-foot, 3-inch, 300-lb. bulk to his rap handles of Biggie Smalls and the Notorious B.I.G. to his dramatic assassination in an L.A. drive-by, the man was large. And now from early indications, it looks like his posthumous album Life After Death, ’til Death Do Us Part is going to be huge.

Released Tuesday, the 24-track, double-disc set was supposed to debut at No. 1 even before B.I.G.’s March 9 murder. After the slaying, hip-hop aficionados and curiosity seekers aren’t having any problem shelling out 20 bucks for the album, which should follow the trend set by Nirvana, Selena and Tupac Shakur, all of whom topped the charts with posthumous releases.

Based on our purely unscientific first-day sales figures, Death will have a very long shelf life. A clerk at a Washington, D.C. music store said it was “selling like wild” hours after its release. A manager at Tower Records on Sunset said the Los Angeles-outlet sold 150 copies during a midnight promotion. “Death is a commodity, you know,” Ramsey Jones, a salesman at the Greenwich Village Tower Records told the Associated Press. Jones claimed that his store sold 105 albums in an hour. “I have to keep stocking it every five minutes.”

“Death is a commodity, you know?” said Ramsey Jones, a clerk at Tower Records in Greenwich Village, where he couldn’t keep the CD on the shelf. “I have to keep stocking it every five minutes.”

At one point, the store sold 105 copies of the double-CD in a single hour, Jones said. Uptown at HMV Records, fans of the Brooklyn-born rapper were just as anxious for “Life After Death.”

“It’s flying out of here,” said manager George Romero. “… This album was going to be big already. After this (the shooting), forget it.”

Sales of his debut album, “Ready to Die,” more than tripled in the week after the rapper’s slaying. “Ready to Die” sold more than 10,000 copies nationwide after the slaying.

Nearly unanimous positive reviews, some teetering on effusive, are certain to help the B.I.G. album’s longevity. “A B.I.G. classic,” gushed USA Today. “He may have been rap’s ultimate cinematic narrator,” chirped the Los Angeles Times, which rated Death four out of a possible four stars.

Bullet-riddled door of Suburban in which rapper was killed to be sold

April 28, 1997

BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. (AP) - The bullet-riddled door of the rented GMC Suburban in which rapper Notorious B.I.G. was gunned down will be sold to raise money for charity.

Budget Rent A Car Beverly Hills rented the green 1997 Suburban to the Los Angeles production company FM Rocks. Notorious B.I.G. was sitting in the passenger seat March 9 when he was killed in a drive-by shooting.

The passenger door was the only part of the vehicle that was damaged.

“Everybody’s telling me the door must have some value. We’d like to somehow find a way to sell the door to the highest bidder and then donate the money to charity,” Budget co-owner Corky Rice said Monday.

When the rapper’s posthumous album “Life After Death” became a national best-seller, it occurred to Rice and partner Jerry Seimons that they had a rare collectible on their hands.

“So many people say it has value. I’m trying to figure out how to turn this terrible incident into something good. If you put the money to good use, I don’t think it’s in bad taste,” Rice said.

Rice said the Challenger Boys & Girls Club in South Central Los Angeles would be the beneficiaries of the money raised.

The value of the door wasn’t known.

“I guess if I were to auction something like that, I’d put it out there with a very reasonable-looking estimate, say $3,000 to $4,000,” said Michael Schwartz, director of entertainment memorabilia for the Butterfield & Butterfield action house.

Rice and Seimons are willing to sell the $38,000 Suburban as is with the bullet-pocked door in place, but they don’t believe anyone would be interested.

“We haven’t decided when or where to auction the door,” Rice said. “We don’t want to be tacky. We want to be in good taste. We don’t want to make any profit at all.”

Meantime, Death Row Records approached a Nevada resort to offer the bullet-riddled car in which rapper Tupac Shakur was killed last September in Las Vegas.

“We told them we weren’t interested,” said Aaron Cohn, spokesman for Primadonna Resorts in Primm, Nev. The resort paid $250,000 in 1988 for the bullet-riddled car in which Bonnie and Clyde Barrow were killed in a 1934 shootout.

The Shakur death car isn’t the same, Cohen said.

“It’s not a piece of American history the way the Bonnie and Clyde car is. But maybe in 20 years,” he said.

http://centennialsociety.com/pez.biginfo.html

Stress in any form can be tough to deal with, but stress related to your relationship is always the hardest. Relationships can really be the cornerstones to our lives, and when there’s conflict in that area of our life it’s hard to prevent it from affecting the other areas. No matter how great your relationship is, there will be times when it’s stressful. I think that a certain amount of fighting is healthy in relationships, as it leads to growth and a stronger bond between the two people involved. But what do you do when you’re actually going through it? How do you prevent yourself from letting it completely overwhelm your thoughts and ability to do the things you need to do? Here are some tips for handling the stress in your relationship.

Focus on your work/school

A great way to take your mind off of your relationship issues is to focus on your daily activities even harder. If you work or go to school most of the day, you have a great opportunity for a distraction. Puting in extra effort to your activities is doubly positive because it lets get a lot accomplished as well as taking your mind off of your current relationship problems. If you need even more time to cool off, decide to stay late to put in a little extra time that you can maybe benefit from later.

Get some space from each other

Sometimes people have conflict in their relationship simply because they’re always in such close proximity to each other. It can be beneficial for both people to just go out and have a good time with their friends and/or co-workers to give your relationship some space. Time away allows you both to calm down and think a little clearer. It can be hard to remember all the good things in your relationship when you’re right in the middle of an argument, but a little time away can get you both thinking about what the relationship really means to you.

Talk it out

Eventually you have to deal with whatever issue is causing the conflict. This is especially true in situations where you’re married or living together. The best medicine can be a calm discussion about how both of you feel and why you were upset in the first place. The key is being calm and adult about the situation. If you can’t discuss it without fighting again, then they may something much deeper than a normal fight going on. If you’re able to get away from the issue for a while then come back and work it out in a respectful manner, it can help to actually bring you closer as a couple.

Relationship stress is something that just takes over our lives at times. The biggest key to dealing with it is to make sure you are able to come to a resolution with your significant other regarding the root cause of your stress. Otherwise, you’ll be destined to repeat the same cycles of stress for the same reasons. It’s hard enough to go through issues the first time, you don’t want to revisit them on a recurring basis. Use these tips to help you get your mind off of the issues for a little while, then work together to get past the issues you’re dealing with in your relationship. Everybody goes through similar situations, but those that have the ability to deal with them will be better off in the long run.

http://www.kissyouback.com/how-to-deal-with-relationship-stress/

I’m not only going to share the things that I wish I was told about adoption prior to doing it, but the things I’m glad I was told as well. Keep in mind this list pertains primarily to state adoptions:

Whether you give birth, or adopt, if you haven’t met the child prior, you really never know what you will get in regard to special needs.

The process of waiting and emotional ups and downs will better prepare you for the road ahead.

Get involved with a support group! Being in one ourselves, my husband and I had a better understanding of how the system worked.

The waiting is more difficult than I could have imagined.

Take classes, read books, build a resume of special needs training so you will stand out among other waiting families.

Be prepared for ignorant comments by well meaning people. It’s harder to hear a stupid remark about adoption related things when you’re emotionally wrapped up in it. Be prepared to kindly educate others.

Know who does what in your state office. Keep your worker’s name, their supervisor, your certifier (if applicable) on hand. Once a child is placed, keep the child’s worker’s contact information on hand in addition to their supervisor, the child’s CASA, and attorney.

The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Check in and make sure your case worker never forgets who you are.

It is typical for families to go to more than one committee or staffing before they are selected to be parents.

There are vast resources online including state policies, and online support groups where you can ask questions.

Spend lots of time with your spouse or family prior to the adoptive placement because your life will truly change.

I found a deeper appreciation for my children as a result of what my husband and I went through to get them. In addition, I found a love that I didn’t know existed before becoming…

http://adoption.families.com/blog/things-i-wish-i-was-told-about-adoption

by Pam Connell | More from this Blogger

Yesterday at 09:52 PM

What does a nine-year-old think and feel about her adoption? What thoughts and feelings does she have on revisiting the orphanage where she lived during the first year of her life and meeting her caregivers?

My recent China Adoption Book Review Series (The Lost Daughters of China, China Ghosts, and Wanting a Daughter, Needing a Son Parts One, Two, and Three, has covered writings by adoptive parents and from researchers, journalists and academics into abandonment, orphanage care, and domestic and international adoption in China.

With Kids Like Me in China, we get to hear from an adoptee. Ying Ying Fry visited the orphanage where she once lived in December 2000. With her mother, writer Amy Klatzkin , cofounder of Families with Children from China (FCC) and editor of Passage to the Heart: Writings from Families with Children from China, she wrote this book about that visit. The book is full of great photos, most from Brian Boyd.

“I’m Chinese-American, but I wasn’t born that way. When I was really small, I was just Chinese. Then my American parents came and adopted me, and that’s how I got the American part.”

Ying-Ying attends a bilingual English-Mandarin school in San Francisco (although it turned out to be a different dialect than her caregivers at the orphanage used) and had had the chance to visit several Chinese orphanages on an earlier family trip, but this visit to her old town and orphanage, meeting caregivers who remembered her, and spending time with girls her age who still lived at the orphanage, at their school, and with a Chinese family at their apartment brought up new feelings.

Ying-Ying describes these experiences, the infant rooms, the toddler rooms, the preschool children, the children with special needs, and the sleeping quarters of the older children, who go to neighborhood schools in the daytime and come back to the orphanage at lunchtime and after school.

Ying-Ying helps with the babies. She notes that babies are washed lovingly, but the bottles are propped up on quilts since workers can’t hold all the babies. She notes how busy the caregivers are. She notices that everyone wears several layers of clothes to stay warm, but also notes that money donated by adoptive families has purchased heaters and air conditioners, washing machines, music players and toys.

The book is written in Ying-Ying’s own voice. She tells how she sometimes had to leave the room wondering why all those girls were there (many of them had, like Ying-Ying herself, been found at the police station as a baby) when it wasn’t their fault, although she understands some of the reasons she’s been given-that family name is important, although she doesn’t really understand why, and that boys take care of their families in old age. People having more children than allowed can lose their job and house, pay huge fines, or undergo forced operations. Ying-Ying wonders about her birth mother, family and siblings.

“Sometimes I think a lot about stuff like that. But I don’t talk about it much.”

Ying-Ying travels through some of the Chinese countryside and notes that city and countryside seem like two different worlds, but not much is said about the countryside in her book.

I found it very enjoyable to hear a child’s view of adoption, and my daughter enjoyed hearing the thoughts and experiences of a child just her age who was also adopted.

http://adoption.families.com/blog/china-adoption-book-review-series-kids-like-me-in-china

Liberating Muslims from “their god”

Mosab Yousef says that he “crossed all the red lines in (his) society”. While that may be true, the real story of this son of Hamas leader Sheik Hassan Yousef, who spent years spying for Israel’s internal security service, the Shin Bet, is far more complex. It even includes Yousef’s decision to convert to Christianity.

Why does a son raised in a devout and loving Muslim family reject virtually every idea with which he was raised, go to work for those he regards as enemies, and render himself persona non grata to his entire family? Obvious Oedipal possibilities arise - a son’s need to overthrow his powerful father and make his own way on the world, as do answers which hinge on a search for personal gain, and the fact that Yousef ’saw the light’, etc. But the explanation here rises above those kinds of easy explanations.

This is a story of the self-defeating nature of religion-based violence and political brutality, not the betrayal of the Palestinian cause which Yousef still supports. In reading Mosab Yousef’s comments to CNN, one is struck by the fact that he still regards Israel as an enemy. He simply came to see that Hamas was far worse. Why? Because of the brutality they practice against their own people, because of their failure to distinguish between civilian and military targets and how those things cause what he Yousef calls “spiritual and soul death”.

This is not simply a story of “one man’s hero is another man’s traitor” either. This is a story about the real differences between two cultures at war with each other. By no means is either side free from blame about the continued suffering on both sides of the conflict. And the continued positioning by each side to paint themselves as blameless will only prolong that suffering.

This is a story about the ways in which brutal, rage-driven, repressive regimes ultimately betray themselves, driving out their own best and brightest. One need not support Israel to stand with Mosab Yousef against that kind of regime. One simply needs to admit that the ends do not justify the means in all cases. A lesson which Hamas has yet to learn.

One need not leave Islam to learn that lesson, even though Yousef felt compelled to do so. Speaking to the Wall Street Journal, the now-Christian explains “What matters is not whether my father is a fanatic or not, he’s doing the will of a fanatic God…The problem is not in Muslims,” he continues. “The problem is with their God. They need to be liberated from their God. He is their biggest enemy. It has been 1,400 years they have been lied to.”

While Mr. Yousef the younger may now understand God’s will in more life-affirming, forgiving and gentle ways, he seems to have kept the totalitarian theology with which he, along with so many others of so many faiths, was raised.

The God of Muslims is the same as the God of Christians and Jews. To tell people that Islam is a 1,400-year-old lie is simply the first step down a road that would inspire the Christians Yousef now calls his brothers to do to Muslims what he saw Muslims do to Jews, Christians, and even other Muslims. That’s a lesson which Mr, Yousef still needs to learn.

Rather than liberating people from their gods, perhaps we should simply challenge them to articulate how their chosen god actually commands them to protect the lives of those who have made different choices. Ironically, Mosab Yousef would probably still be a Muslim if Hamas had figured that one out.

By Brad Hirschfield | March 7, 2010; 2:58 PM ET

http://newsweek.washingtonpost.com/onfaith/brad_hirschfield/2010/03/liberating_muslims_from_their.html

By Rob Lovitt
Travel writer
msnbc.com contributor
updated 2 hours, 5 minutes ago

The clock is ticking on the three-hour rule.

Starting next month, air travelers will get something they’ve never had before: regulatory protection against tarmac delays of three hours or longer. Whether that’s good, bad or unnecessary is a matter of opinion, but it already looks like the new rules will offer both more and less than many people have bargained for.

Big fines for bad performance
Announced by the Department of Transportation (DOT) last December, the new rule runs 81 pages and seeks to enhance airline passenger protections on several fronts. It takes effect April 29….

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/35766268/ns/travel-rob_lovitt_columns/

Can chewing sugarless gum really help you cut calories?
By Kathleen M. Zelman, MPH, RD, LD
WebMD Expert Column

Chew on this: Chewing gum can be good for you. Not only can it freshen your breath, it can help you overcome cigarette cravings, improve your memory — and even help you lose weight.

Contestants on The Biggest Loser use it regularly, and studies have shown that chewing gum can help control cravings, manage hunger, and promote weight loss.

Still, don’t get the idea that chewing a few sticks of gum a day is going to melt off the pounds. A few small studies have shown that chewing gum can help you shave calories. But this won’t lead to significant weight loss unless you also follow a reduced-calorie diet and get regular physical activity.

Sugar-free gum is best because it is usually less than 5 calories per piece, compared to 10 calories for regular gum. In fact, diet plans like Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, and the American Diabetes Association consider sugar-free gum a “free food.” (But “free” doesn’t meal unlimited amounts; some artificially sweetened items can have a laxative effect if over-consumed.)
Weight Loss Benefits of Chewing Gum

Research from the University of Rhode Island showed that people who chewed gum consumed 68 fewer calories at lunch and did not compensate by eating more later in the day. Chewing gum also helped the study participants satisfy their cravings and resist fattening treats. And there’s more: Gum chewers actually burned about 5% more calories than non-gum chewers.

Another study, from Louisiana State University, indicated that chewing gum was helpful in controlling appetite, decreasing participants’ daily intake by 40 calories and reducing snack cravings.

If you cut 50 calories a day or so by chewing gum, then make another small lifestyle change — like switching from 2% to 1% milk or taking the stairs at work — you can easily cut 100 calories a day. And that could add up to losing 10 pounds in a year.

Perhaps the biggest benefit of chewing gum comes if you routinely reach for a stick of gum instead of something more caloric like a doughnut or candy bar. Substitute gum for a snack-size bag of chips once a week, and you could lose two pounds in a year.

Here are some tips for saving calories by chewing gum:

* Chew gum when you have the urge to eat a snack between meals.
* Pop a piece in your mouth to signal the end of the meal, or to prevent mindless munching while watching TV or at a party.
* Keep some in your purse or briefcase to help you resist high-calorie temptations.
* Keep your mouth busy with a piece of gum while you cook to prevent nibbling.